My calendar very clearly states that summer will begin on June 21 this year.  Apparently, someone forgot to tell Mother Nature.  I would say that summer has landed with a thud, but with the humidity we’ve been having, it’s more like a splat.  SPLAT!!!  Welcome to Summer.  With temperatures in the nineties and humidity almost as high, it has been a challenge to maintain my ladylike, unflappable demeanor.  My great-aunt used to tell us, “horses sweat, men perspire, and women glow.”  Well, let me tell you that at the rate I was glowing yesterday, I could have illuminated an entire city!  Maybe that would leave enough power to keep my air conditioner cranking out the cool.  Have I mentioned that I am in love with my air conditioner?  I try to remember my childhood days, before A/C, and I wonder how we survived the steamiest days of summer.  I think the answer has something to do with popsicles and long days floating in the pool.

Last night, we attended a basketball game in a gym with no air-conditioning.  In preparation for my foray into polite society, I rinsed my body, changed my shirt, and gave myself the sniff test to assure that I didn’t smell like last week’s lunch meat.  All fresh and sweet, I headed for the car, only to feel the glow dripping from my forehead to my chest as I slid into the car.  Welcome to Subway!  What would you like on your sandwich?

I’m thinking that maybe I’d like to be a plant until this heat wave passes.  My visits to the garden find the tomato and pepper plants standing straighter and taller each day.  Somehow this smooths my damp and ruffled feathers, as I set my sights on the good things that lie ahead, thanks to the summer heat.

Today I will write a letter to Mother Nature and remind her that Spring is supposed to offer us transition between Winter and Summer.  I will request, respectfully, that maybe she could tone it down a bit and give my body time to leave the cold behind.  I will offer up all the wisdom I can find about preventing hot flashes and hope that I don’t catch her at a bad moment.  Just in case I do, maybe it would be a good time to fill out that job application at the hoagie shop.  At least I would feel less conspicuous there.