“There is a sacredness in tears.  They are not the mark of weakness, but of power.  They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues.  They are messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love.”

– Washington Irving

We are in the midst of the holiday season.  There is no escaping it.  Stores and streets are decorated with bright colors and lights.  Radio stations and television have filled their schedules with sounds and sights of the season.  We become caught up in the holiday spirit and look for ways to spread joy to friends, family, and strangers.  Everywhere we hear proclaimed, “It’s the most wonderful time of the year!” For those who suffer loss, pain, illness, loneliness, or depression, the contrast of this most wonderful time can be unbearable.

I had a visit yesterday from a healer friend, and she remarked about all the opportunities she has had lately to hear the pain and uncertainty of others and to allow their tears to flow until their need to cry had passed.  There is something sacred in being called to sit in the presence of another’s tears.  There is something deep and profound in the experience of hearing the sadness and doubt of another human being in the midst of the tinsel and celebration.  There is something humbling in the experience of being shown the soft underbelly of another person’s grief — in being trusted to heal, not hurt, the most vulnerable spot of another’s soul.

It takes courage to cry when the whole world seems to be singing and dancing.  It takes patience and compassion to step outside the celebration and not say, “Stop crying!  You should be happy!  It’s the most wonderful time of the year!”  Sometimes I think we turn up the noise — the colors, the sounds, the sparkle — at this time of the year so that we won’t hear the sighs and the sadness and the grief.  We are afraid that if we tune into anything that isn’t shiny and bright, our own celebration will somehow be tarnished or ruined.

Something miraculous happens when we can open our hearts to the tears of someone who suffers and not be afraid of their sorrow.  If we can sit long enough, in the midst of the tears, we can see the transformation occur that turns the tears of sadness to tears of joy.  It is then that the true gifts of the season are exchanged — gifts that cannot be bought and sold, gifts that flow from the heart of compassion and heal the wounds of another human being.  When we step outside our own need for artificial happiness and man-made decorations, we discover that the True Light of the holiday season cannot be hung on a tree or strung from the rooftops.  It burns deep within us, in the heart of our being.  When we connect, heart to heart, with the light of someone whose struggles have dimmed their own heart-light, miraculous things can happen.  Healing can flow into the hurt, the soul-fire can be rekindled, and the true celebration can begin.